Black-Haired Dad Isn’t Something You Reap - Chapter 20

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Chapter 20. If You’re Not Going to Date a Hundred Lovers, Don’t Go Around Calling Yourself a Tyrant (8)
I was in a foul mood.
Ever since Prisoner declared he would change my education supervisor, I’d been duped by Chief Chamberlain and Marshmallow for an entire week, attending lessons diligently. My body and spirit had both become twisted.
To express this sentiment, I took a toy pipe to my lips during tea time with Prisoner and blew—whoosh, whoosh.
Choco burst into laughter at the sight of me, but she didn’t particularly hold it against me. Right now, my irritation was directed far more at Prisoner than at her.
“The weather is lovely.”
“If you keep playing innocent like that, the Princess might actually become truly upset.”
“The tea is delicious.”
“That one’s doing it on purpose, I’m telling you.”
You’re just as bad for egging me on, Choco! You’re not even trying to mediate—just narrating the situation!
I boasted the lung capacity of a five-year-old and blew the pipe so hard the ball flew completely away, then wedged the tobacco between my fingers.
“That delinquent behavior—you learned that from Lorowi too?”
Prisoner made a comment, but the only people I’d ever seen smoke in front of me were my mother and Prisoner himself.
“I learned it from you! You, you bastard! You!”
“I only showed you once. Logically, it would be Lorowi.”
“That’s not fair! Pipe!”
Prisoner, you smoke paper-filtered cigarettes! My mother smokes a pipe!
Isn’t it obvious the way they’re smoked is different?!
As I presented my argument with perfect logic, Prisoner’s brow furrowed sharply and he turned the page of his book.
“It’s not good, so don’t learn it.”
“If you know that, then you quit too.”
“I’m an adult, so it’s fine.”
“An adult? You, you beast, what does it mean to be a proper adult?”
“Enough.”
No, we hadn’t even gotten started, so why was he telling me to stop? Frustrated, I kicked his knee with my short legs, and Choco burst into cackling laughter.
“What business did you want to discuss?”
“Formally speaking, it’s the same as father and mother. Do I need a reason to meet with you?”
“I see. So you have no business then?”
“I don’t want to study. Skip the lessons.”
“It’s only two hours a day. We’re already giving you plenty of rest time.”
“I don’t like it. No studying.”
“How do you plan to rule the nation without learning?”
“I won’t rule.”
“When you become an adult, I’ll have to pass the throne to you.”
He was worried about something so trivial. Foolish Prisoner. I happened to know a very simple solution.
I cleared my throat with a cough, then pointed at myself with both hands solemnly.
“I’ll do it.”
“Yes.”
Then I pointed at Prisoner.
“You don’t.”
“Hmm.”
What do you think? A stroke of genius, wouldn’t you say?
Proud of my own scheme, I shrugged my shoulders, and Prisoner grabbed two pastries and stuffed them into his mouth before asking me a question.
“How would one ruin a nation?”
“The way Emperor does—by indulging in wine, women, and song.”
“I have no interest in medicine, alcohol, or women.”
“S-so… men…?”
“No interest in men either. How on earth did Lorowi raise you?”
Ah, what kind of person are you, lacking all desire and ambition?
Born into the Duke’s House, you’ve never known want for money. For the same reason, you’re no stranger to the taste of power either. And our nation’s bureaucratic system is sound enough that even if Emperor spent twenty years making a complete mess of things, the foundations wouldn’t crumble.
So then, what’s worth considering…?
“A war of conquest, perhaps?”
“War, you say.”
“That’s right. If you lack the skill to manage it, and the Emperor keeps charging forward recklessly, the nation collapses within a decade.”
Wow, I’m really sharing the secret recipe for destroying a nation. I saw this in a history book recorded before our common language was established.
The translator was Kisomalos, so it’s probably something you can’t find anywhere except the Imperial Secret Archive.
That book contained the rise and fall of a certain mounted nomadic people who unified half the continent. A great empire that recklessly expanded territory and launched conquest after conquest, only to vanish without a trace within a decade.
As I recounted that story deliberately, Prisoner looked at me with interest and spoke.
“You seem quite interested in warfare.”
“Wh-what? I wouldn’t say that much…”
“You summoned the sisters of Count Bridget’s house and discussed the conquest of Loruruje Fortress with them.”
So Prisoner, you’ve met that theatrical woman and the historian girl.
Well, Emperor had them brought to the Palace thinking he could seduce them, so you must have encountered them when he ordered them sent home.
“Not really. We didn’t talk for that long.”
“If an hour doesn’t count as long, then surely you can endure two hours of royal studies classes.”
This Prisoner, so infuriatingly airtight! Say one thing, he counters with another! Say another, he blocks it with something else!
Give me a break, will you!
“Considering your aptitude, I’ll add military studies to your royal studies curriculum. There, satisfied?”
“Satisfied? What are you talking about, you lunatic!”
“We have some time today, so let’s play together.”
“Don’t say another word, you absolute lunatic! Not. One. More!”
Prisoner, hearing only what he wanted to hear from my words, snapped shut the book he’d been reading and placed it on the table.
I wondered what he was reading while enjoying tea so gracefully, and the book’s cover read: “Guidelines for Good Parenting: Nurturing Emotional Development in Children.”
“Hah…”
Prisoner, you really are something else.
You’re going to do exactly what that book says? Play with me to foster my emotional development?
“I heard from the Bridget sisters. They said you enjoy pretend play.”
“Well, I wouldn’t say I’m particularly fond of it…”
“What am I supposed to do?”
Isn’t this game just whatever you want to do anyway?
Thanks to Prisoner’s overwhelming enthusiasm, I summoned Emily to teach the palace handmaidens how to stand with a large sword, and we assigned roles in turn.
“I’m the father. Prisoner’s mother. Choco is the daughter.”
“A daughter, not a son, Your Majesty?”
“Yes.”
“I see… very well, then.”
Since it had come to this, I wanted them all to taste a bit of what I felt that day. My second daughter had suddenly gotten angry with me and thrown her coat, and it was absolutely terrifying.
I pressed the handmaiden’s belly with a flourish—ding dong—and stormed into the house, flinging everything I held in my hands to the ground. I shouted “Hey!” at Prisoner, who was leisurely enjoying his tea, and then threw a tantrum just as my second daughter had done.
“You wretched woman! Your husband returns home, yet you don’t even come to greet him!”
“….”
Hmph. How’s that? Surprised, aren’t you?
I was about to make a show of overturning the tea table, but Prisoner’s expression darkened, and he tapped the seat across from him with his finger.
“Sit.”
“I won’t sit! You wretch, there’s not a single warm soul in this household!”
“A marriage is an equal partnership. I am not your servant, so why should I go out to greet you?”
“W-well….”
This Prisoner is spouting logic again.
What do I do? This isn’t quite what I imagined.
“I bring home the money, and yet….”
“Are you claiming superiority because you work and are an economic agent? I work too. Managing servants so you can return home to comfort, paying taxes—without me, this household wouldn’t function at all.”
“W-well, still… in a normal household, there should be some warmth….”
“If you want unconditional love, then live with your parents or get a dog.”
Hey! If that’s the case, why did you marry me in the first place! If you married me for love, shouldn’t I at least expect some affection?!
“If you won’t show me love, why did you marry me! Instead of bothering me, you should just get a dog!”
“Marriage is a form of contract. It can be maintained without love if the purpose is fulfilled.”
“Ugh!”
Ah! Let’s divorce, let’s divorce! I wanted someone to love and cherish for life, not a machine to manage the household!
Speaking those words with fury, Choco, who had been silent until now, appeared with a sinister expression.
“How convenient. Then I shall take Father for myself.”
“So you finally show your fangs.”
“I claimed Father first. You were the one who stole him in the middle, Mother.”
“What kind of unfilial conduct is this? He is your father.”
“Not a drop of blood flows between us!”
What is Choco doing? She’s gone mad.
Choco drew her sword at a speed invisible to the eye, and Prisoner hurled the chair he was about to sit in. The terrace chair, clearly forged from steel, split in two.
Can a normal blade even cut through steel? It shouldn’t be possible.
How did Choco cut it?
“I liked Father first. Me, me! This me!”
“Being loved by such a creature would have been your greatest misfortune. You should thank me for protecting you all this time.”
Why is this household such a mess? Is every game of house I play destined to end in chaos? Was I born beneath such misfortune?
“Ah, w-wait, um, ah, ugh.”
Stop fighting, you lunatics!
The two of them were locked in a battle that looked like a fight to the death, and they were smashing windows and terrace railings alike, so I felt tears welling up from sheer terror.
‘Not that I’m particularly afraid of dying myself.’
Now that I’d finally begun to settle in, the fear came from the thought of both of them—the ones who’d volunteered as my guardians—dying. My body was already weakened, my tear ducts barely functional, yet I felt genuine tears threatening to spill.
“What in the world are you two doing?!”

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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