Black-Haired Dad Isn’t Something You Reap - Chapter 14

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Chapter 14. If You’re Not Going to Date a Hundred Lovers, Don’t Go Around Calling Yourself a Tyrant (2)
“Yaaaawn.”
I yawned widely and shifted my position back and forth. I’d been so tense that exhaustion was killing me.
Sitting on Prisoner’s lap had grown uncomfortable, so I sprawled out instead, but it was just as awkward—my stomach ached when I lay prone, my back ached when I lay supine.
Why didn’t Prisoner have a physique like Marshmallow’s?
“Prisoner, gain some weight.”
“I have a good build.”
“That doesn’t count as cushioning.”
I complained while tapping his rock-hard thigh muscles. Prisoner then pouted and ordered an attendant to bring cushions. Once they were arranged along his lap and the jade throne, lounging became considerably more comfortable.
“Ahhh! So fluffy!”
The jade throne in the Second Audience Hall was remarkably spacious. Perfect for lying down.
‘No wonder that blockhead only sought this place out instead of the Third and Fourth Audience Halls.’
I rolled around on Prisoner’s lap. At one point I nearly tumbled off, but Prisoner tilted his leg and caught me, setting me back down gently on his knee.
It was so entertaining that I deliberately rolled off after that.
Around the fourth time I rolled, I noticed the key ministers from various departments entering the audience hall. They’d apparently rushed here upon hearing the news. And with good reason—if Prisoner had a favored retainer, these ministers might lose their positions.
Prisoner would surely handle it wisely, but it seemed best to avoid any personnel changes for now. Even ministers who hadn’t supported the Emperor could harbor resentment over this matter.
“If you do not oppose me, you will all remain unharmed.”
Right. Even if we dragged a stray dog off the street and crowned it Emperor, it would govern better than the blockhead, yet Prisoner, you manage adequately enough.
There’s nothing ordinary in this world. If an ordinary ruler can actually do their job, there’s nothing more to ask for.
“If anyone opposes my ascension, raise your hand. I will execute you where you stand.”
Hmm… it’s somewhat extreme, but certainly within his capacity to accomplish.
I nodded and rolled across his lap once more. As I tumbled off and Prisoner caught me, several ministers visibly frowned.
“As the Princess’s new protector, I’d prefer not to witness the unpleasantness that will unfold in the palace for some time. However, this particular matter requires this little one to decide.”
“Pisha.”
“Pisha must be the one to decide.”
Prisoner, you truly listen well. And your consideration in shielding a child from such horrors is admirable.
Though I’ve already witnessed you stack Imperial Guards’ corpses into mountains, perhaps such things aren’t considered atrocities in your eyes. The thought of that actually made me grateful.
It was unsettling that Prisoner was now declaring he’d commence something far more horrific than mountains of corpses, but that’s his burden to bear.
“Regarding the execution date and method of Helbatro Mayuna Kisomalos.”
Must you really have me—his own daughter—decide that? Your character is quite something.
I wasn’t alone in thinking this; the ministers and other palace officials murmured among themselves. Choco covered her face in despair.
But fear not, Choco. I had a punishment I’d been saving for just such an occasion.
Lying on Prisoner’s lap, I raised my hand sharply.
“Buh-form!”
Ugh! When will this paralysis finally wear off?
Immolation!
“Buh-form, marida, buh-form!”
Since my stiff tongue wasn’t conveying it properly, I decided to elaborate.
“Your mother will burn! Isn’t sending her the same way true filial piety?!”
Bwahahaha! So I’ve lived long enough to show filial piety to the blockhead!
I was laughing so hard I thought I’d die, so I slapped Prisoner’s knee repeatedly. Prisoner seemed delighted by my proposal and let out a hearty laugh. Then I heard the Head Attendant Grandmother standing in the back mutter quietly, “Vicious woman.”
Well… I suppose she meant it as a comment on his nature.
She was still spry even when I passed away in my previous life, so by now she must be practically flying around. Just how old is that grandmother anyway?
“Head Attendant Grandmother, I shall remember your calling me a toxic woman for the next ten years.”
“Your Majesty, how could I ever speak such vulgar words to you?”
“I see you doubt my hearing. That transgression shall be remembered for twenty years.”
“But, sire…”
“You dare talk back? That adds thirty years to your account.”
….
Yes, Grandmother, perhaps it’s best if you just keep quiet.
I understand that since you were the Emperor’s caretaker in his childhood, the Imperial Family’s legitimacy seems trivial to you, but these are precarious times.
“Pisha, shall I kill her?”
“Father, this grandmother is quite useful. It would be wasteful to dispose of her.”
“Then I shall not kill her.”
“If you keep giving away divine power to every Tom and Dick, there won’t be anyone left around.”
“Humans die and die, yet they keep crawling back out again.”
Prisoner, come on. Let me hold your hand and we’ll go together. Let’s get a personality evaluation.
You’re strange. Very strange.
The fact that you raised an army to become my father out of nowhere shows you were never sane to begin with.
When I rolled across his lap again, Prisoner caught me and lifted me up, then handed me to my aunt.
“The Princess’s presence is no longer required. Return her to the palace to rest.”
“Understood. I shall treat her with proper courtesy in public, but you should know there will be none in private.”
“Your devotion to propriety as a subject is commendable.”
Wow, our Prisoner really knows how to butter up my aunt.
When Prisoner scoffed dismissively, my aunt left the audience hall calmly and channeled divine power into her fist. With a thunderous crack, one of the Imperial Palace’s pillars shattered under her punch.
“Aunt. Aunt, that divine power is precious.”
“Pisha! Stop it!”
“Ten hits like that and we’re done for, Lacma.”
….
“Well then, we need to save money.”
Divine power doesn’t flow endlessly—there’s a fixed monthly allotment, so we must use it efficiently.
Some people don’t even know where Kisomalos is, so we should count ourselves blessed that Lorowi is still with us. If we waste it, what will we do?
As I rattled off my complaints, my aunt buried my face against her chest and ran all the way to the Princess Palace.
Though it was still early, exhaustion weighed on me and sleep came quickly. After Emily attended to my bath, I changed into my nightclothes and fell asleep with both earlobes firmly grasped.
My aunt had thrown a tantrum about sleeping with me.

✦ ✦ ✦
[Excellent work, you fool! Good heavens, you actually managed to bring Chiron into your fold! You did it!]
I was about to drift back to sleep when I realized the voice belonged to Kisomalos, and my eyes snapped open.
My mind cleared, but all I could see was darkness.
In the pitch-black void where I couldn’t see even an inch ahead, only the ancestral spirit’s voice came through with crystal clarity.
[Thanks to forming a bond with Chiron and his daughter, my divine power is returning! I think I’ll be able to manifest directly and help you from your side!]
“Kisomalos! Is that really you? I’m not just dreaming, am I?!”
[Not a dream, you fool! I’m channeling a message into your dream before I fully manifest!]
“Ah, I see! I’ve heard that in households that serve spirits of lower rank or higher, ancestral spirits often appear in dreams to impart important knowledge, but I’ve never experienced it myself, so I wasn’t quite sure what to expect!”
When I spoke honestly, Kisomalos let out an enormous cough and tried to brush it off, saying there were circumstances involved.
“But you’re saying your divine power returned from forming a bond with his daughter? I thought divine power would return just from me scraping by?”
[That’s not the point, you simpleton! I told you from the beginning to gather talented people!]
“When did you say that! You said people would gather if I just scraped by!”
[We’re fated to gather followers by living like trash, yes. But you need to actively gather your supporters so the divine power accumulates faster, you blockhead!]
That makes sense when you put it that way.
When I exclaimed in admiration, Kisomalos wept bitterly, lamenting that all the true heirs who inherited his power were complete idiots.
“So what are you saying? Should I make a hundred fathers? You said divine power returned because I made a father?”
[Sigh… you absolute moron….]
[Ha… Emperor…]

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Novels. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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