That Piece Of Trash Was Me - Chapter 121

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Chapter 121

“….”

The Marquis said nothing.

Whether he couldn’t answer, or whether he was gauging my thoughts.

I didn’t have the usual leisure to gauge another person’s feelings.

I just wiped away my tears roughly with my sleeve and opened my mouth.

“I struggled desperately to survive.”

I wished the tears flowing down my cheeks were piercing the Marquis’s heart instead of mine.

With such a wicked, evil, honest heart.

“That’s how I survived to be able to talk with you like this, Marquis. So don’t blame me.”

“….”

“No one can blame me.”

Not anyone in this place.

“I wasn’t blaming you.”

Marquis Aster Frazier, who seemed about to vomit something, slowly drew in a breath. Like a vast ocean barely managing to calm itself.

“…I wasn’t blaming you.”

“Of course you would say that.”

I muttered meaninglessly.

I know.

That Grandfather had truly been good to me as time passed.

That the twins had opened their hearts to me.

And that they would eagerly step up for anything concerning me.

But what about Tulia before that?

What about my heart that was anxious as if walking on thin ice?

The sorrow that had been tightly constricting my chest came pouring down like ashes.

The countless red cracks etched into young Tulia’s heart would heal someday, but not now.

I knew that neglect was also abuse.

I knew that endurance was also self-harm.

I used to encourage myself with words like ‘everyone is treating Tulia the villainess quite well,’ but I actually knew.

‘Should everyone really be this indifferent and cold to Tulia, who is family?’

That was my true feeling.

That’s why.

“I knelt and begged Grandfather. Just to let me live.”

“….”

“I asked if he couldn’t give me my share of the dowry in advance, saying I wouldn’t marry or cause any trouble. I really felt like I was going to starve to death.”

“….”

“I kept smiling to win my older brothers’ favor. Because I knew they disliked me. Because I knew they had no interest in me….”

How scared and frightened I was then, how much I trembled thinking my throat might be cut at any moment.

The result was a happy ending, but I still couldn’t forget that the process was hell.

“Why didn’t you send someone to the border?”

I wanted to turn every single word the Marquis said upside down and return my wounds to him.

Like a wicked daughter desperate to hurt her parent, I couldn’t stop asking back with reddened eyes.

“When everyone was mocking me as the ‘abandoned young lady,’ should I have courageously sent someone to you first, Marquis?”

“….”

“Even though I felt like I was going to starve and freeze to death, begging you to please spare even a penny….”

“….”

“Could you say such things, Marquis?”

“….”

“What about Grandfather? What about my older brothers?”

“…Tulia.”

Lisian slowly bit his lips.

I looked at Leon with his devastated expression and Grandfather with his heavy gaze in turn, then shed tears and laughed bitterly.

“See? No one could do it.”

“….”

“No one could have begged like that… Why did everyone think I could do it….”

“….”

Though I chattered noisily alone, no one answered, no, couldn’t answer.

In the end, only silence remained.

I quietly shifted my gaze.

Elegant sunlight poured in through the large window, and the chandelier and candlesticks also cast beautiful light.

But this place was as quiet as a shadow where no light entered.

Like flowers that froze to death in the shade, no Frazier in this place opened their mouth.

Tulia’s eyes are light green, so don’t my eyes now look just like withered grass blades?

Rising from my seat, I politely bowed my head toward the Marquis.

“Thank you for the child support money you’ve sent all this time, Marquis.”

* * *

“Randel Warehouse wasn’t originally like this.”

I muttered while burying my body deep in the blanket.

A few hours ago, after leaving the conference hall as I was, I didn’t return to my bedroom in the main castle.

Nor did I go to Lisian’s room.

I just didn’t want to be there, so I walked out of the main castle and moved wherever my feet took me, arriving at this place, Randel Warehouse.

The place Tulia had thought was a castle.

The place Tedrick was later kicked out to.

The old bedding in Tulia’s former bedroom, which had been full of musty-smelling old bedding that wasn’t properly dried, had been completely replaced with new ones.

With good blankets, sheets, and pillows that were fluffy, soft, and fragrant.

Wrapping my body in these cloud-like things made me feel a little better.

Adel, who had worked this magic, sat beside me and carefully arranged the blanket.

“Thank you.”

“Not at all, Miss. It’s something I should naturally do.”

She had quietly entered the court room earlier.

So she must have heard everything I said while shedding tears.

Adel probably had no idea either.

That my child support money was being completely embezzled.

I didn’t know either.

“Miss, you’re hungry, aren’t you?”

Her eyes looking at me were slightly reddened. I blinked and spoke in a hoarse voice.

“I want to eat dinner and sleep, Adel.”

“I actually prepared stew, Miss. I thought meat might be hard to digest, so I made cream stew with pine mushrooms and clam meat.”

Mushroom cream stew generously served in a wide porcelain bowl.

Steam rose from the hot cream stew where crispy fried croutons were richly melting.

“It goes down well. I had no appetite.”

As I muttered while quickly emptying half the bowl of stew, Adel answered in a voice tinged with moisture.

“It’s because your heart feels empty and sorrowful, Miss. Please eat plenty.”

That day, late in the evening.

I nodded at Adel’s request to pull the bell cord if I needed anything, as she would be in the next room.

‘Originally, this was a place where no one would come no matter how much you pulled the bell cord.’

Perhaps it was because my position had changed.

Perhaps it was because I now had people around me.

The fire was blazing brightly in the fireplace, and the bedding that smelled of sunshine was already filled with warm heat.

The room itself was still in an old state, but that actually made it more calming for people.

When I first opened my eyes here.

When I looked in the mirror and saw Tulia Frazier standing there.

It was truly absurd.

From the moment Tulia’s memories flowed into me, and after the status window bestowed upon me that terrifying Main Quest.

Whenever I was scared, I entrusted my ego to ‘Tulia’.

Tulia is originally a crazy scoundrel.

Tulia is originally the top boss of this area.

It made me boldly do actions that I couldn’t do as Han Ina.

Perhaps the existence called Tulia Frazier was my one and only shield, and at the same time, my only lifeline.

That’s what kind of existence she was.

“Later, when a very long time has passed…”

So when I safely complete the Main Quest as Tulia and no longer need to worry about my life.

Will I then completely refer to myself as ‘Tulia’?

I don’t know.

But I hoped Tulia would be happy.

In other words, it was the same as saying I hoped I would be happy.

I got up from my seat and walked to the window. When I pulled back the shabby and worn curtains that hadn’t been changed, dust flew everywhere.

“Cough cough cough cough cough.”

Coughing, I hurriedly opened the window wide.

The dusky night sky with moonlight seeping through. The air was cold, but it cleared my mind completely.

“Phew. I almost suffocated to death.”

Winter was slowly coming to an end, and when spring came, tulips would bloom abundantly across that vast garden.

‘I deliberately had them plant lots of tulips too. Now all the household affairs are mine.’

When I told the gardeners to decorate half the garden with tulips, not a single gardener objected. They all bowed and said they would do it, which was even thrilling.

I imagine the tulips that will bloom in full in the garden. All kinds of colorful vitality. Spring held in abundance.

That space shining in various colors would be fantastic just to look at, and would be comforting.

“Let’s be happy. We have to be happy, even if it’s out of spite.”

Just as I was muttering to myself.

Knock knock.

The sound of knocking on the door came right after.

“Adel? Come in.”

Creak, along with the sound of the door opening, came thud, the sound of low footsteps.

It was different from Adel’s usual soft and quiet footsteps.

Heavy footsteps where the difference in weight could be clearly felt.

My eyes widened greatly as I turned around.

“Marquis?”

Because Marquis Aster Frazier was walking in.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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