Surviving as the Villainess’s Servant in a Martial Arts Novel - Chapter 42
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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Episode 42
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Mother’s funeral was held simply.
Many people came to pay their respects.
Starting with the Po Couple next door, the physician from the medicine room who had helped us before, village people we occasionally greeted, and even people from the Seo Family.
Especially many members of the Seo Family came, and I remember being a little surprised that even people I had barely exchanged a few words with showed up. Uncle Hwang even burst into tears while bowing with me.
“Oh my, what kind of tragedy is this! How hard you worked for her, how could this happen? Even heaven is heartless, how is this young child supposed to live alone…”
“Uncle…”
I said with a bitter smile.
“I’m fine.”
Really.
Perhaps because I had cried so much beside Mother that day, or maybe because it didn’t feel real when it came time to actually hold the funeral. Strangely, my head just felt numb and no tears came.
I was just a little tired. A terrible sense of emptiness filled me, making everything feel meaningless.
‘What have I been doing all this time?’
That feeling continued until the last day of the funeral.
Mother’s body was buried behind our house, on top of the hill.
Actually, I wanted to bury her together with Seo Dan where she had fallen, but that place was deep in the mountain and it wasn’t easy to transport the coffin there. At least it was comforting that the grave faced the mountain.
I watched in a daze as they buried the coffin, covered it with earth, and built the burial mound in a series of processes. When the grave was completed, the workers packed their things and went down the hill.
The mourners bowed before the grave and then offered me words of comfort. Only then did I come to my senses and respond to them. As I saw them off one by one, I found myself alone before I knew it.
“…”
I stared blankly at the grave. Then I collapsed onto the ground with a thud.
I felt strange.
It was strange that Mother was inside that grave, and it was strange that I wouldn’t be able to see Mother starting today. Even the fact that I no longer had anywhere to return to.
Only then could I finally realize it. Ah, I had become alone once again.
‘What have I been doing all this time…’
When I clasped my trembling hands together.
Rustle.
I was startled by the presence behind me and turned around. Then I opened my eyes wide.
“Young Miss…?”
A young girl with her face covered by cotton cloth, holding a lantern.
It was definitely the Young Miss.
Only then did I look around. The surroundings had become dark before I knew it. It seemed like people had left around midday, but I had been sitting blankly in front of the grave and time had gotten late.
I quickly got up and headed toward the Young Miss.
“Young Miss, what brings you here…?”
To my question, the Young Miss answered simply.
“Paying respects.”
Then she set down the lantern and approached the grave quietly, bowing respectfully.
I watched her in a daze, and when the Young Miss finished bowing and looked toward me, I came to my senses and bowed in return. As I straightened up, I opened my mouth, not knowing what to do.
“Um, I’m grateful that you came, but how did you get all the way here? I never imagined you would come. Oh, I don’t mean I’m disappointed or anything, it’s just that you don’t like going out…”
“…”
“Is it okay for you to be here in the middle of the night? You brought guards with you, right? Don’t you need to head back soon…?”
“It’s fine.”
The Young Miss answered calmly.
“I came with Father. He said he had business to attend to, so I came up first.”
“Ah, with the Master…”
I nodded. A moment of silence fell. I scratched my head and glanced at the Young Miss, then muttered awkwardly.
“I… I really mean it when I say thank you for coming. Mother wanted to see you too.”
“…”
“I must have talked about you so much. Every night I would tell her about what happened between us, and each time she would be delighted but secretly curious about you.”
“…”
“When we were going to the Namgung Family Estate together, I was planning to introduce you to her, but really…”
“Yeah.”
The Young Miss continued in my place.
“That’s unfortunate.”
I smiled brightly looking at the Young Miss like that. Then I looked back at the grave and spoke bitterly.
“Mother would have definitely liked you if she had met you.”
The Young Miss said nothing. I too was just staring at the grave.
A cool breeze passed by once.
Winter was coming. Since Boluo County was in the south of the Central Plains, it wasn’t very cold in winter, but it would take quite a while for fresh green grass to sprout on the grave.
When spring comes, will flowers bloom by the grave too? Will this emptiness fade away then… I found myself opening my mouth without realizing it.
“I’ve wanted to have a family since long ago.”
The Young Miss turned to look at me.
“Actually, Mother now wasn’t my real mother. My real parents abandoned me. They said neither would take me, and in the end they left me with Grandmother and went away.”
“…”
“Of course Grandmother was good too. She was kind to me. But the loneliness wouldn’t go away. I wondered what it would be like if I had a real family, real parents…”
“…”
“So when I got Mother, I tried to be even better to her.”
I took a breath for a moment. My chest felt heavy.
“If I was better to her, if I devoted myself like a real child, maybe this time I could be accepted. Maybe I could have a family.”
“…”
“But there was always anxiety in one corner of my heart. Because I wasn’t real. Whether Mother could grow attached to me when I wasn’t real blood, whether she might hate me…”
“…”
“The more anxious I became, the harder I tried.”
I laughed helplessly.
“But I was already family.”
“…”
“Mother already thought of me as her child. Even though I deceived Mother, even though I wasn’t honest with her, she wasn’t angry. Instead… she wanted me to be happy.”
“…”
“Do you know what I thought when I heard those words?”
The laughter subsided.
“Perhaps, the person who drew the line saying we could never become family for life… was myself.”
I looked back at the grave again. Then I reached out and brushed the grave. My hand caressing the soil was trembling finely.
“We had just become family.”
“…”
“She had just said she loved me.”
“…”
“How can this be happening? How can she leave like this?”
“…”
“Again, again.”
I muttered.
“Being alone again is too cruel…”
I finally dropped my head down. Once again, it became hard to breathe. Slowly suffocating felt like sinking into a sticky swamp. If I were to be submerged all the way to the top of my head like this…
I had never been able to cry freely like this before.
“Ah, ah….”
Tears naturally flowed out of my mouth. I reached out and embraced the Young Miss.
“Ahhh…!”
The Young Miss just silently patted me without saying a word. Those small hands felt so reassuring, and the warmth of being held in her arms filled me with such joy. I cried loudly and sobbed for a long time.
Suddenly, Mother’s last words echoed in my ears.
“Take care of yourself.”
‘I will take care of myself. I really will take care of myself. So please, Mother, you too….’
The night was growing deeper.
Only the lamp placed beside us flickered as it illuminated the two of us.
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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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