I Won’t Pick Up The T*ash I Threw Away Again - Chapter 60

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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#60

“That can’t be.”

A ray of light appeared through the pitch-black darkness.

Leilah raised her unfocused eyes upward.

Then she saw a man smiling warmly.

She could tell it was a man, but couldn’t recall who he was.

He felt familiar, so he seemed like someone she saw often… Who was it?

Leilah stared blankly at the man and slowly blinked her eyelids.

“You seem sleepy.”

Is that so? Now that he mentioned it, it did seem that way.

But she couldn’t sleep because she was afraid of hearing thunder again.

She needed something else that could drown out the thunder.

For example…

“…Sing me a song.”

The man chuckled softly at Leilah’s request.

“What an impudent request.”

“Don’t want to?”

“Even speaking so casually.”

The man acted as if he wouldn’t do it, then slowly opened his mouth.

A low, sweet singing voice resonated softly. It was an attractive voice.

As his singing gradually filled her ears, she could no longer hear the rain and thunder.

Only Kalian’s singing reached Leilah’s ears.

Since she couldn’t hear the thunder, her trembling body gradually found stability.

‘This is… a lullaby.’

It was the first time. The first time someone sang a lullaby for her.

Leilah had always only eavesdropped on lullabies sung for other people.

That’s why she had been scolded so many times.

They said she was acting like a little mouse, just like the child of a mouse would.

But… so this is what lullabies were like, such sleepy songs.

Before she knew it, her tears had stopped, sadness disappeared from her eyes, and drowsiness filled that space. Overwhelming sleepiness washed over her.

Even though she thought she shouldn’t fall asleep like this, Leilah couldn’t overcome the drowsiness.

Her pitch-black eyes disappeared behind thin eyelids as her body went limp in Kalian’s arms.

Despite her face being soaked with tears, there was a faint smile on her lips.

“What are you smiling about?”

Kalian chuckled as if incredulous and brushed away the hair that had fallen over Leilah’s face.

With his thumb, he wiped away all the remaining tears on her face and examined the wound on Leilah’s ear.

Her ear was covered in wounds. Besides the fresh wound, there were many old scars too. There were even indented marks.

It seemed she had suffered from this for quite a long time.

“It’s not simply that you’re afraid of thunder.”

What on earth happened to you, Leilah?

He was curious but had no intention of asking.

It would be terrible if he carelessly asked and reopened painful wounds.

He could only hope that the fresh wound would heal well without leaving a scar.

Kalian didn’t mind his sleeve getting dirty as he wiped away the clotted blood.

After cleaning most of the blood, Kalian laid Leilah on the sofa and called for Rahel.

Rahel was shocked when he saw the wound on Kalian’s face.

“Your, Your Majesty! The, the wound…!”

“It’s nothing. Just a small scratch.”

That doesn’t look like just a small scratch,

Rahel swallowed his words and quickly examined Leilah lying on the sofa as well.

Leilah’s condition didn’t look very good either.

Did the two of them fight or something?

No, fighting with the Emperor wouldn’t make sense, and even if they did, to dare wound the Emperor’s face…

“Nothing happened.”

Kalian said firmly while looking at Leilah with a subtle expression.

“You saw nothing.”

This meant to keep silent about everything he saw here.

Including the wound on his face.

“Understood.”

“And bring some ointment.”

“Should I bring a blanket too?”

Rahel asked perceptively.

Kalian thought for a moment, then nodded.

“Bring all the documents I was reviewing here as well.”

Since it seemed he wouldn’t be sleeping tonight, he planned to look over documents.

* * *

I suddenly came to my senses without warning.

Usually when this happened, my head would hurt as if it were splitting, but strangely, it didn’t hurt at all.

Rather, I felt refreshed. My eyes and ears stung slightly, but there was nowhere else that hurt.

I actually felt clear-headed. I felt like I could do anything.

Today I should finish the work I couldn’t complete yesterday.

…But how far did I get yesterday?

I couldn’t remember. This had never happened before.

Panicking, I opened my eyes and blinked widely at the familiar ceiling.

That ceiling is… the aide’s office?

That means this is the aide’s office.

Why am I sleeping here…

“…!”

Memories I’d rather not remember came back in fragments.

From hiding under the desk while working, startled by thunder and lightning.

To trembling in fear and meeting Kalian, being held in his arms.

I couldn’t remember what happened after that, but I must have caused him trouble.

And not just anyone, but the Emperor.

“I’m crazy, I’m crazy!”

I wasn’t just ordinarily crazy.

I covered my face with both hands, wanting to cry.

“How can I face His Majesty now?”

“How can you face me? Just face me normally.”

“…!”

When Kalian’s voice suddenly rang out, I was startled and turned my head.

Then I saw Kalian sitting at Baron Delrond’s desk, looking at documents.

My mouth fell open automatically.

“When, when did you get there…”

“Since you were staring blankly at the ceiling?”

That means he saw everything from the beginning!

No, more than that, I was lying down in front of the Emperor.

I hurriedly got up, fixed my disheveled hair and clothes, and bowed toward Kalian.

“I-I’m sorry! How dare I sleep in front of Your Majesty…!”

“It’s fine.”

Kalian put down the documents he was reading and looked at me.

“How do you feel?”

“I’m fine.”

“Really?”

I nodded vigorously to show I really was fine.

“Hmm.”

Kalian made a small sound through his nose as he looked me up and down, then stood up and walked toward me.

So, so close.

At a distance closer than I had expected, I took a deep breath and couldn’t dare exhale.

If he had something to say, I wished he would say it quickly, but Kalian said nothing and just stared at me intently.

That gaze was so burdensome and nerve-wracking that I clasped my hands tightly together.

Then Kalian frowned and took my hands.

“If you grip so hard, your wounds will get worse.”

Wounds? Ah.

Only then did I notice that my nails were cracked.

I must have had another episode.

Sometimes when stress reached its peak, on nights with thunder and lightning, I would have episodes.

Clawing at my own flesh.

Or scratching others wildly.

Wait a minute. That means…!

I hurriedly checked Kalian’s face.

Though faint, I could see red scratches on his cheek and nape.

Those wounds hadn’t been there when I went to report yesterday.

“D-did I do that?”

I asked, hoping it wasn’t true, but Kalian smiled awkwardly. It was an affirmation.

Good heavens.

To wound the Emperor’s face. I really must be insane.

How should I apologize for this? No, wouldn’t I be arrested immediately?

My refreshed mood plummeted rapidly. My mind went blank and I became anxious. My mouth went dry.

I fidgeted restlessly and bowed repeatedly.

“I-I’m sorry. How dare I wound Your Majesty’s face…”

My lips trembled so much that I couldn’t speak properly.

This wasn’t something that could be resolved with a simple apology.

Even if he imposed a severe punishment, I would have nothing to say.

Not knowing what to say or how to say it, I finally closed my mouth, and Kalian shrugged his shoulders.

“I’m joking. This wasn’t caused by you, so there’s no need to worry.”

It was obviously a lie. A white lie to ease my worries.

Rather than feeling lighter, my heart grew heavier. The fact that I had caused trouble for such a good person weighed heavily on my heart.

I was also ashamed of having shown such an unseemly side of myself.

“I’m sorry…”

It was regrettable that saying such words was the only way I could express my current feelings.

“I told you it wasn’t because of you.”

“But…”

“Are you saying you don’t believe my words?”

Kalian asked with a deliberately stern expression.

To dare doubt the Emperor’s words would be disloyalty.

But I also couldn’t bring myself to readily agree, so I answered in a small voice, “No.”

“Then that’s settled.”

As if satisfied with just that, Kalian smiled brightly and rang the bell on his desk.

An attendant entered and bowed respectfully.

“Prepare breakfast.”

“Yes, sir.”

Breakfast, was it.

I glanced briefly at the window where the bluish atmosphere of dawn still lingered.

From the situation outside the window, it seemed the sun hadn’t risen yet.

Fortunately, it didn’t seem like I had slept for very long.

Still, to have stayed out all night. Sara must be very worried.

“Leilah, you should eat breakfast and then go home to rest.”

To rest at home. I shook my head in confusion.

“I cannot do that. There’s work I need to do…”

“No.”

Kalian cut me off.

“You need rest.”

“But…”

“I clearly told you to rest.”

As if he wouldn’t change his mind, Kalian spoke firmly and then went outside.

* * *

After returning from the Giltian Duchy, Fillen couldn’t sleep a wink all night.

It was because of what Duke Giltian had said.

“Then the rumor that Princess Leilah Tebesa is His Majesty the Emperor’s mistress must be false as well.”

It was an absurd story.

There was no way the upright Leilah would become the Emperor’s mistress or anything like that.

Certainly not…

“…”

Suddenly remembering the scene of Kalian and Leilah having an intimate conversation, Fillen’s face hardened.

It was the first time Fillen had seen Leilah talking so brightly and cheerfully with another man.

Of course, since the other party was the Emperor, she couldn’t have conversed with a frown.

But there was no need to smile so brightly, was there.

And she had even embraced him.

“…Has she really become the Emperor’s mistress?”

Thinking that way, Leilah’s confident behavior made sense.

So that’s why you won’t come back to me and keep holding out, Leilah.

Suspicion devoured anger and gradually grew larger.

Fillen’s face twisted horribly.

“Hugo! Prepare to go out immediately! I need to meet Leilah!”

He had to meet her and confirm whether the rumors were true.

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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