I Made a Mistake in my Confession. Can I Cancel it? - Chapter 19

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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Episode 19

“I should have just stayed still.”

‘Let’s just go home…’

It was when Lillian, who had been sitting for a while, got up. The door opened again. And in Kartan’s hands as he returned was a wet towel.

“Sit down.”

He sat in the chair and patted the seat next to him. She thought he would be thoroughly angry, but his voice was unexpectedly calm. Bewildered, Lillian went and sat where he told her to.

‘Why did he come back?’

She was curious but couldn’t bring herself to ask.

“Stay still. Don’t run away again.”

Then he took her hand and tried to wipe it with the wet towel. Like someone touching a cut wound, Lillian flinched. A light scolding came back from him.

“I told you to stay still, didn’t I?”

“Ah, yes…”

‘It must be dirty.’

Instead of mentioning it, she tried not to move even a finger as he said. But the curiosity that kept rising was hardly resolved.

“But why aren’t you angry?”

Even with her parents’ rude words and actions, and even though he seemed displeased when she refused the gift, he was calm.

At Lillian’s question, Kartan answered as if incredulous.

“Do you see me as someone who’s always angry?”

“…”

For a moment, hit right on the mark, she couldn’t say anything. To her, His Grace the Archduke was indeed a frightening person. Probably other people felt the same way, just not showing it outwardly.

Once again, a heavy sigh escaped from his mouth. At that sound, Lillian somehow felt her heart sink along with it.

“I’m human too. I laugh when I’m happy, cry when I’m sad. And I get angry when I’m angry.”

“Yes…”

“Ha, I don’t know why I’m explaining such things.”

“I’m sorry.”

Even while speaking, she didn’t know what she was sorry for, but it seemed like she should say it. But what came back was only an incomprehensible sound.

“I keep sighing whenever I see you.”

She wondered if she had made some mistake, but there was none. She was about to unconsciously say sorry again but closed her mouth. Somehow it seemed like the same situation from before would repeat.

“The necklace can’t be returned now, so dispose of it as you wish.”

“Yes…”

Lillian looked at Kartan wiping her hands as if observing him. His Grace the Archduke still seemed like he would get angry at her at any moment. But somehow, only the words His Grace the Archduke had said wouldn’t leave her mind.

‘Do you see me as someone who’s always angry? I’m human too.’

‘Right, His Grace the Archduke is also human. A person with emotions…’

Once she became aware of that fact, she felt strange. Come to think of it, His Grace the Archduke had never treated her carelessly or acted according to his moods to make things difficult for her.

‘But then why am I so afraid of His Grace the Archduke?’

Could it be because of the label that follows him?

The exiled Imperial Family member.

A patricide who killed her parents and blood siblings.

For a moment, another word flashed through her mind.

‘Monster.’

Lillian quickly shook her head. No matter how frightening His Grace the Archduke was, how dare she harbor such thoughts. Even she thought it was too terrible.

At that moment, he raised his head and their eyes met.

“What are you staring at like that? Is there something on my face?”

“…No.”

Somehow she felt guilty. But even though it was truly a situation to be sorry about, she couldn’t apologize. Because it was obvious what His Grace the Archduke would say.

“I’ll wash the rest off with water when I get home.”

“Alright, then.”

Only then did Kartan release Lillian’s hand that he had been holding.

* * *

As soon as the Baroness saw Lillian returning home, she began scolding her.

“Why did you come back already? You should have stayed the night.”

“…”

While midnight was late enough for Lillian, it apparently wasn’t for her. Soon she discovered the stains on Lillian’s skirt and frowned.

“Oh my! What is that mess you’re wearing? Did you roll around in a garbage dump or something?”

“I’m sorry.”

“Really, why are you so careless? What do you do properly? How are you going to marry His Grace like this? Just today alone. You should have made some excuse to stay the night. Like having a headache or something, there are many options. And while I’m on the subject…”

Once the nagging started, it continued endlessly. Even Lillian, who had been listening silently, began to feel overwhelmed. And for good reason, as many things had happened throughout the day.

‘Sigh. I want to go to my room and rest…’

It was when she was unconsciously thinking such thoughts. The Baroness spoke with fire in her eyes.

“Are you even listening to me?”

“Yes? Yes.”

“What kind of attitude is that? Are you saying you don’t want to listen to me anymore?”

“N-no.”

Whether angered by Lillian’s reaction, the Baroness’s voice became even sharper.

“What do you mean no! I saw you sighing just now! Ha, this is why a person’s origins are important. How far can lowly blood born outside go no matter how much you teach them?”

“I’m sorry…”

Even bowing her head was useless. The Baroness continued to pour out harsh words about her birth. Lillian remained still as always. She was an illegitimate child, and her very existence alone would be hateful to her mother.

“Ugh, I can’t live like this. If I raised you this far, you should be worth something, shouldn’t you? For your father to do well, you need to do well. If His Grace the Archduke dislikes you, even the money we’re receiving now will be cut off, you know?”

“…”

Suddenly, Lillian could no longer let the words “I’m sorry” come out of her mouth. She didn’t mind being criticized herself. But causing trouble for His Grace the Archduke was too embarrassing to bear.

“Mother, please don’t make unreasonable requests to His Grace the Archduke anymore.”

The Baroness looked Lillian up and down as if she were incredulous.

“Ha, what did you just say?”

“…”

“Oh my, look at what she’s saying. Not thinking about how we’ve raised and clothed you all this time, and now you’re arguing with us just because you spent some petty money? You’re completely crazy over a man!”

Even though her scolding Mother was frightening, she couldn’t back down. Right now, for whatever reason, His Grace the Archduke was looking after them, but someday they would reach their limit. If that time came, she couldn’t guarantee everyone’s safety.

“Mother….”

It was before Lillian could even finish speaking. The Baroness shouted angrily.

“You, do you think you’re some kind of Archduke’s wife or something? Don’t be mistaken. Your Father stepped forward to at least get permission for courtship! Know your place before acting up.”

“What do you mean by that?”

Come to think of it, she knew nothing about the details of that time. She had just thought that one day His Grace the Archduke suddenly came to their Home and received permission for courtship, but wasn’t that the case?

“The day you came back from staying overnight at the Archduke’s Residence, we talked to His Grace. We told him to take responsibility if he was going to sleep with a daughter who was about to be married. So he reluctantly came to get permission for courtship.”

Lillian couldn’t say anything. Seeing her just listening calmly, the Baroness must have thought Lillian was shocked, so she triumphantly added more words.

“So did you think His Grace the Archduke really loved you or something?”

‘Love? Were the Archduke and I in that kind of relationship?’

No matter how much she thought about it, she couldn’t picture such a scenario with His Grace the Archduke. Rather, the fact that he was trying to repay a debt to her felt burdensome.

‘Is that really the case? But he got hurt trying to save me, so there’s no need to repay any debt, right? Besides, he didn’t even remember that I saved him….’

Rather, after hearing Mother’s words, she felt confused.

“So we need to extract as much as possible before His Grace the Archduke gets tired of you, you foolish thing!”

“But, even so, I don’t think this is right. Mother, we shouldn’t do things that would shame our noble dignity….”

Suddenly the Baroness’s voice began to tremble.

“You, so now… you’re saying you’re embarrassed by what we’re doing?”

Then she even shed tears. When the flustered Lillian was about to add something more, Baron Dante shouted angrily from behind her.

“Lillian, what did you just say!”

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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