A Blank Slate Regression for the Idol That Lost His Original Mindset - Chapter 60

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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A Regression Guide for Idols Who Lost Their Initial Intentions Episode 60

“Alright, not much time left! Let’s endure just a little more until the end of the year!”

I clapped my hands and helped the members sprawled on the practice room floor get back up.

With the three major terrestrial networks’ year-end music festivals approaching, we practically lived in the practice room all day long.

At least we were fortunate to have secured reality show content with the Christmas commemorative song music video making footage and various daily life recordings.

Thanks to Gyeon Hajun, who had been giving one-on-one tutoring to teach choreography for the special stage, Seo Yehyeon had at least reached a level where he could manage group dance moves to some degree.

Though he was still far from matching the angles properly.

I felt frustrated that we needed to complete it to at least get praised for knife-sharp choreography.

“Can’t we stop doing and do instead?”

Ryu Jaehee suggested while still sprawled on the practice room floor.

It was obvious he was scheming because he wanted to move less.

“Yeah, then we’d become guys who not only lost the WAMA Rookie Award to KICKS but are also inferior in skill. This hyung would be so very proud of our group like that.”

“You say you’d be proud, but your eyes have gone crazy…”

“Don’t look at me, look at Gyeon Hajun instead?”

Ryu Jaehee, who saw Gyeon Hajun leaning against the mirror with a quiet smile, jumped up and dragged Kim Dobin, who was rolling around nearby, to his feet.

“Hyung, if you don’t want to die, get up quickly… Hajun hyung’s eyes have gone crazy…”

Kim Dobin, who glanced up to see Gyeon Hajun’s eyes, got up at lightning speed.

Only then did Gyeon Hajun’s eyes return to normal as he grabbed Seo Yehyeon and rattled off precautions.

“Pay attention to matching timing while watching the person in front. The angles might be a bit difficult to match right now, but try to roughly align them while looking in the mirror.”

The arranged version of started playing. We’d heard it so much that the original song was becoming hazy now.

How many hours had passed? We safely finished today’s practice and left the practice room.

Only Seo Yehyeon remained alone in the practice room, saying he wanted to practice more.

I adjusted my snapback to face backward and let out a sigh of lament with my breath.

“If you just look at the time that hyung spends practicing, he should be winning world championships, so why doesn’t his skill improve?”

“There are people like that. People with innate clumsiness. Even if they practice like crazy, they barely follow along at about one-fifth of others’ pace, so they go crazy too. If they were completely stiff it’d be one thing, but since they do improve somewhat with practice, they can’t give up either.”

Kim Dobin, who despite his short life had consistently pursued dance as a hobby and major for more than half his lifetime, shrugged his shoulders as he spoke.

“I’ve seen quite a few people like that. Yehyeon hyung is probably under tremendous stress too. I’ve only seen one person who overcame that and perfected their dance skills so far.”

Won’t the miracle of Seo Yehyeon becoming that one person ever happen?

Thinking of Seo Yehyeon, who even after 8 years took days to memorize choreography and made dance mistakes on stage by default, I could only sigh.

Kim Dobin quietly added, perhaps interpreting my reaction somehow.

“People like hyung who are somewhat naturally gifted probably wouldn’t understand even if they lived their whole lives.”

“Then you understand?”

“I don’t know either. I’m just saying this because I’ve seen cases like that. How could I know when I’m much more naturally gifted than hyung?”

“Are you being cheeky?”

I gave him a word and spoke to Gyeon Hajun, who was walking alongside us.

“Jun, if it gets too hard, just pass it to me. I know because I’m experienced – the stress is no joke.”

“No, it’s okay. Yehyeon hyung is making an effort too, and he’s following along better than I expected.”

I couldn’t tell if Gyeon Hajun’s calm expression was acting or sincere, which was puzzling.

Having an acting genius as a friend is really inconvenient in this way.

I thought we’d become friends who could read each other’s emotions and moods just by looking at faces, but when Gyeon Hajun decides to hide something, even I find it hard to read.

“But hyung, why don’t you wear the snapback I gave you as a gift?”

Because it’s not my style, kid.

But if I said this, the guy would probably really cry, so I deflected appropriately.

What if the system deducted initial intentions for making a member cry?

“How could I use something our youngest member gave me as a gift just to cover my messy hair?”

“That’s what you say, but you don’t wear it normally either.”

“Let’s not dig too deep. It’s tiring for both sides.”

As I lightly ruffled Ryu Jaehee’s hair, Kim Dobin chimed in cheekily from the side.

“Hey, you can be honest, hyung. You don’t like that snapback, right? I definitely told him from the side that it wouldn’t be hyung’s style, but the youngest said he liked it and just bought it anyway.”

“Shut it, Doby.”

As I replied and put my hands in my pockets, I finally remembered that I’d left my cell phone in the practice room.

No wonder I felt like I was leaving something behind when I left the practice room.

“Ah, I left my cell phone.”

“Should I text Yehyeon hyung later to bring it?”

“No, I’ll go get it now, so you guys go in first.”

I was a typical 21st-century human with cell phone separation anxiety, so I immediately changed direction and returned to the practice room.

How would Seo Yehyeon know when to come if I waited without my phone?

When I slightly opened the practice room door, music flowed out through the gap.

I stood at the doorway with my arms crossed, watching movements that now showed a fairly dance-like form instead of floundering.

Perhaps sensing my presence, Seo Yehyeon abruptly stopped moving and turned to look at me.

“What, why did you come?”

Seo Yehyeon asked after stopping the music. Without saying anything, I strode over to where my cell phone was placed next to the speaker, picked it up, and shook it.

“To find this.”

I nodded and stopped Seo Yehyeon, who was about to play the music again.

“Why don’t you stop around here?”

Seo Yehyeon frowned and shook his head with a stubborn expression.

“No. I still haven’t perfectly learned the moves. I need to master everything by today to match the group dance angles.”

“If you push yourself more than that, you’ll strain your body. At least take a break before continuing.”

I sat down leaning against the mirror with a thud and patted the spot next to me with my palm.

After hesitating for a moment with a conflicted expression, Seo Yehyeon sat down a little distance away from me.

Once even the noisy music disappeared, only quiet silence settled in the practice room.

It was Seo Yehyeon who first broke that silence and spoke to me.

“Hey.”

“What.”

“Even from your perspective, I’m pathetic, right.”

I suddenly felt a chill down my back. Why is he suddenly acting like this? Is he feeling self-loathing and starting up to quit…

I searched my mind for whether something like this had happened before the regression, but recalling that before the regression we never even had the chance to practice such intense choreography.

The current situation was definitely fucked up.

No matter how hopeless that guy’s skills are, a 5-member formation is much better than a 4-member one.

What cut off my thoughts that were extending to a 4-member Reve was a dry, thoroughly exhausted voice.

“Why did I say I’d become an idol?”

“That’s right. I’m curious too. It’s not like being an idol is the only path in the entertainment industry.”

Though the problem was that acting didn’t work out.

At my muttering, Seo Yehyeon turned his head to stare directly at me.

“I’m not being sarcastic. I’m really curious.”

At those words, Seo Yehyeon, who had been moving his lips, let out a long sigh.

“I had no future. No talent, mediocre grades, no social skills, nothing I particularly wanted to do. Even college was chosen based on my grades to match a department, so it wasn’t fun either.”

The inner thoughts he calmly laid out were definitely something I was hearing for the first time.

Despite spending 7 years together, I had never shown interest or heard this before.

“But I happened to get cast. I knew I couldn’t dream of a major entertainment agency with my skills, so I just came in. I also got an empty promise that they’d definitely debut me within 6 months.”

There wasn’t a trace of desperation in Seo Yehyeon’s reason for debuting. I wasn’t angry at that indifference because I had similar reasons.

“I thought appearance was the most important thing, but it wasn’t. My only advantage was just a bonus here.”

“I thought you considered that the most important since you pay so much attention to appearance management.”

“Where else do I have advantages besides that? Dobin has dance, Jaehee and Hajun have singing, you have rap and producing, but rather than being outstanding in any area, I’m lacking if anything.”

Before the regression, during our failed idol days, Seo Yehyeon was the one who struggled the most among the five of us.

At the time, I thought it wasn’t even funny.

Four who couldn’t make it despite having skills, and one who entered the group solely based on looks without skills.

The guy with the second shortest trainee period and nothing decent besides his face.

Someone else should be the one showing they’re depressed, saying they’re dying from how hard it is. Not you.

I thought your mentality was disgustingly weak, that it was annoying.

The feeling when the person I thought that way about became the cause of the group’s revival.

When I was ambiguously enjoying the sudden surge of popularity in a state where I couldn’t fully rejoice or be grateful, and then faced the reality that even the only path I could contribute to the group was blocked.

All those schedules and interviews that poured only onto you, the popularity that flocked to you.

When I realized I had fallen to a position lower than you, whom I had secretly looked down on.

‘I told you not to chip away at people’s self-esteem with that kind of rhetoric.’

You before regression, who made the group reverse course with just your face and smiled confidently and brightly, may not have intended it, but you succeeded in trampling on my pride and self-esteem.

And now that the path to becoming a failed idol is somewhat blocked. Now that the second tier position is confirmed if there are no variables.

I’ve stolen away your chance for your self-esteem to bloom fully.

Even if you develop, unlike before regression, the day when your low self-esteem would bloom fully by dramatically reviving the group like that will never come.

Is this equivalent exchange, or revenge?

“So, please give me an answer. Do you think I’m pathetic too?”

I chuckled while looking at Seo Yehyeon’s hair tips where sweat drops were falling.

“If I say you’re pathetic, will you quit or something?”

No answer came back. Just in case that guy really said he’d quit, I added one more thing.

“I don’t want to mock effort as pathetic.”

At least these words were sincere.

No matter how much they say results are most important, and even though my values are also result-oriented rather than process-oriented.

No one had the right to laugh at someone else’s efforts.

“What’s pathetic is the attitude of sticking to a path to failure while not even thinking of making an effort because it’s hard, even when there’s an obvious path to success. For example, Seo Yehyeon and Kim Dobin who wanted to perform with My Universe instead of One Chance…”

I said it to hit a nerve, but did it work?

Seo Yehyeon, who had buried his face in his raised knees, muttered weakly.

“That was… I was worried I’d hold you back. I was scared I’d hear that I ruined the stage and made us miss our chance to rise because of me…”

“You got scared ahead of time?”

Still, since I knew he had practiced like crazy under my direction, I didn’t say anything more. What’s the point of adding words to something that’s already passed?

“Not only my efforts but also my reason for choosing this path is utterly pathetic…”

At his trembling voice, I looked back at Seo Yehyeon while resting my chin on my hand.

“Come on, so what if it is? If that reason is pathetic, then what kind of utterly pathetic bastard would I be?”

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This chapter was translated by Lunox Team. To support us and help keep this series going, visit our website: LunoxScans.com
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